Most people have no idea what it takes to have a great relationship. They struggle, often with the same things over and over, never realizing they are working against themselves and each other. Whether it’s a parent to child, intimate, family or a work relationship, most people believe that if the other person changed things would get better. There’s nothing more disheartening than waiting for someone or something to change. It leaves you a victim, hoping for something to happen that’s out of your control. My coaching is all about you going to work on you. When you get right with your own stuff, all of your relationships work better.
It’s common to believe that people get upset because of what happens (facts) in their life. Consider that you never get upset over a fact, you only get upset over your interpretation of a fact. A “fact” is what it is, it’s neutral. Only when you judge something bad, wrong or unfair do you get upset. How you think determines how you interpret. Life happens, all kinds of things can affect your bodies, finances and loved ones but it has no control over how and what you think. I’m sure you’d like to think you have control over what happens in life, but you really don’t.
Hiring a coach is a choice to work on oneself. Most of us already realize that we are our own worst enemy, but few know what to do about it. Just turn on the TV and it’s easy to see we are taught that external solutions will help our problems. We are a pill society always treating symptoms but never really addressing the real cause. Sometimes an external change can seem to work but it never lasts. How we think ultimately determines what actions we take and the emotions we feel. Focusing on changing another’s actions is to focus on the symptom, yet we all try because we convince our self that “maybe this time it will work”.
What it takes to have coaching work for you is an open mind and a willingness to work on yourself. As a relationship coach, I help my clients get themselves out of their own way. I may or may not be the right coach for you, that’s why I do a free 20 to 30 minute phone consultation. Call me at 757-932-0246 when you are ready.
